Friday, March 30, 2007

The meaning of resistance

Many times I have heard asked " how would you live your life if you
knew you would die x ", x generally being a short time span, sooner
than generally expected and I hear "I wouldn't be here". Why?

I live like its my last day every day and that is equally my strenght
and weakness. There is something in planning that doesn't come
naturally to the Punjabi in me. I spend today and think about tomorow
when tomorrow comes. If I will have no money then I will sleep on park
benches, look at the stars and talk to strangers to fulfill myself.

I enjoy myself because I don't believe in the future, promises they
mean nothing to me. I live today and have a simple philosophy: to
enjoy what I do. "But we don't always have the luxury to choose". To
which I say:

Even slaves sung songs, and Benigni made the holocaust a
excuses, make it work, that is the real resistance and struggle.....if
only everyone followed their heart and did what they loved then the
world would automatically be a better place....its only when we feel we
are trapped and when most people feel that way do horrible things
happen. I suppose no one wants to be alone and is afraid they will be
isolated and suffer as an individual and my answer to that is
organize.....the home schooling, environment, civil rights movements
are all minority movements that organized to make a niche for
themselves in the world. You don't need to have everyone agree with
you, you just need to be brave enough to speak your heart and demand
your dignity and that in of itself will set you free.....

"Easier said than done". To which I say who said it was suppose to be
easy? And if it was easy would you do it?

And I don't care about winning or losing, I believe on doing that which
makes me free.

"What you thought was freedom was just greed" - Bono Vox


Monday, March 12, 2007

They say its your birthday...

"My 20s were difficult. I think that those are
hard years for most men. Older men want to kill
you, and girls don’t really want you. They’re
most interested in the rich, older guy. For me,
money was scarce, and I was extremely lonely.
But New York was such an exciting place then
that it compensated for all my insecurities." R. Gere

It's never what you imagine it'll be. Sex, death, suffering... Thats
a constant truth in life. Its never how you think it will be.
Literature, arts, film, all provide a glimpse, elude to the feeling of
what the experience is like but its almost always a different kind of

Its like that touching scene in "Lost in Translation" when Bill Murray
is in bed next to Scarlet explaining what happens to a man when he has
a child. Everything changes, and we try to understand what It will be
like, grasp out of curiosity or longing the idea of a thing rather than
the thing itself. We become obsessed with ideals, love, honor,
dignity, death, suffering, only to understand that they are
abstractions. Silly abstractions.

Why do we keep trying to understand when it will never be like the
words we read, the pictures we saw, the music we listen to? Perhaps
because there is pleasure in it. The pleasure in making the attempt.
Or perhaps we like to lie to ourselves. To pretend we know rather than
bravely face the unknown.

It does work the other way around though, ironically. Once you have
lived something and then you encounter a work of art that speaks to
that experience, it is liberating, elating and enlightening. You feel
less alone, you are caught in disbelief that someone put into words
what you always knew, what you felt, in a way, the art form brings you
full circle, confirms your experience and gives it meaning.

What would all this be like if art didn't exist? Where does art come
from? What does it mean in our life? I remember a friend of mine when
he read "Brothers Karamazov" a highly influential book in life tell me
it did nothing for him. How was that possible? My god, to not be
moved by the Russians? He was lame though, maybe he will re-read the
Russians one day. When in trouble read the Russians, an old but true

I look for art to transform me. To change my actions. To guide me.
and in my most vulnerable moments comfort me. I will often spend a
friday night in bed with poetry listening to jazz while the world gets
drunk and stoned. I'd rather scribble bad short stories in my notebook
and read them to lovers than partake in meaningless conversation about
the weather. I want to create. I feel ready now that I have lived a
little. Just a little, there is much more to do, news doors to open as
others close behind me....

We can never go back. There is no going back. And in that there is
beauty and perfection. Don't look back. Look forward. Chin high.
Don't cry. Ok cry a little. If its for the lost ones. The ones no
longer here, the ones we will see again in some other form. The ones
who loved us. The ones that don't. To all those who wanted to...its
for them I really live.


Sunday, March 04, 2007


Kissinger's willingness to make promises became the subject of a
popular joke in Israel: Kissinger goes to see a poor man and says, "I
want to arrange a marriage for your son." The poor man replies, "I
never interfere in my son's life." Kissinger responds, "but the girl is
Lord Rothschild's daughter." "Well, in that case..."

Next Kissinger approaches Lord Rothschild. "I have a husband for your
daughter. " But my daughter is too young to marry." "But this young
man is already a vice president of the World Bank." "Ah, in that

Finally Kissinger goes to see the president of the World Bank. "I have
a young man to recommend to you as a vice president." "But I already
have more vice presidents than I need." "But this young man is Lord
Rothschild's son-in-law." "Ah, in that case..."


ahh kissinger war criminal perhaps (chile coup, cambodia) but what a
colorful motherfucker he was/is. Re-defined what it meant to be a
statesman and brought a little rock and roll to international
relations. "Power is the ultimate aphrodiasiac". I respect that, his
swagger though not all of his policies and arrogance. Its always
problematic when power comes with charisma. it distracts us from
remembering that no matter who, the only response to power is to keep
it in check.