If you get caught up in socializing, being the clown and performer, you lose track of who you are. Only working to clear your thoughts and beliefs in solitude can give you the strength to face up to who you are. Most people never realize this, they live years without hearing that inner voice, trusting in themselves. They give up, drink and smoke it away.
Class clowns suffer at our expense. They become popular but really don't spiritually progress because people egg on their hurts for laughter and acceptance.
"People stopped listening to the music", the Beatles answer to the question of why they stopped touring. They were not getting better. They turned into a spectacle. To get good again they needed to introspect, to go into the studio, to not tour and have fans. They needed to get back to the essence and purity of who they were and what they did. And the music soared out.
The same phenomenon with Pink Floyd and the Wall. The crowd, after a while, made them worse, brought out the worse in them. You start being devoured by the same people who you wanted to love you. Like Patrick Suskand's "Perfume", you smell so good people eat you, rip you to pieces. The more beautiful the peacock the more susceptible a prey.
People fear being alone. They lose faith in the power of solitude. But without speaking we really hear. Without thinking we understand. Without touch, feel. It all comes back to us.
Nature, let it kill us, let it heal us, it is perfect.
Happiness, the quest for happiness will kill us. That was so 1990s, to find meaning and fulfillment in what one does. Now, everyone shut up and get to work. So you spent your 20s, the best years of your life working for a dream that never came. Boo-hoo. Well, now its too late, because you got no hair and your erections are a bit less full. Do you have enough testosterone in you to do something about it? How about drinking yourself to death? Do some coke, or something, fuck some bitches, you will feel a bit better about yourself.
Your problem is that you seek happiness from the outside. Or you thought you would become happy following the rules. You were wrong. While you scorned the adventurers, called them lazy, irresponsible, you diligently went on with your dull life. You didn't realize you were playing a lottery, how many people get sick, break down, or if they win even, they've lost that fire.
Just follow your heart, be not afraid of anything. There isn't much time anyway so stop trying to make others happy.
I want to write clearly and well so that my words may be read by the future. I am part of that tradition of mystics and troublemakers who through charisma and intelligence am able to bring more magic and joy into the world.
Parents, keep your children away from me. Like Socrates I will corrupt them though I won't be as easily persecuted as he was, nor will I accept martyrdom.
To what do I owe my clarity? First and foremost to never succumbing to feelings of being rushed. Then to fasting, not just with food but to everything I may develop an attachment towards. We cannot be a slave to our senses.
If we allow ourselves to be still and empty we realize that there is something inside us that warms and guides us, an energy within, constantly replenishing and healing, giving vitality and joy. This world tries desperately to snuff this out. It is that fire, that force, that can change the world. If only we harness it, are not afraid of it and let it shine shine shine, on.
So beautiful, I never want to lose sight of this truth that springs forth.
Tell all the people that you see, follow me, follow me down.
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